Tag: strength

Acceptance.

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“And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation—some fact of my life—unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing, or situation as being exactly the way it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God’s world by mistake. Until I could accept life completely in life’s terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.”

-Page 417 of the Big Book

The sun was starting to set as we pulled into the parking lot. It was still warm for a day in January for Colorado, and the smell of chili from Wendys was wafting through the air. We walked across the parking lot to the only part of the strip mall still lit up. As I pulled open the door and entered the building, ‘what an eclectic group’ crossed my mind, as my eyes surveyed men and women aging from 20 to 80 from every race. A very nice man introduced himself to me and my partner, he included that he wanted to make us feel at home. It had been about 6 months since I had been to an AA meeting. This was a new one, closer to home, and I was excited to see what the vibe was. The room smelled of coffee as we chose some seats by the front door. The walls were covered in art, the AA steps and traditions, and several other quotes. One of my favorite read, “There’s nothing that bad that a drink can’t make worse.” Ain’t that the truth?

 We began with the reading above from page 417 of the big book – and I knew I was in the right place at the right time. This was the message that I needed to hear. Acceptance. Why is Acceptance so hard to do? Later in the reading it states “There is a bit of good in the worst of us and a bit of bad in the best of us; that we are all children of God and we each have a right to be here. When I complain about me and about you, I am complaining about God’s handiwork. I am saying that I know better than God.” Wow! Huh?!

When situations happen that I think are the worst ever or not fair, I start to question the universe and what the hell it’s trying to do. The funny part is, times when I feel the universe is out to get me- always end up being blessings in disguise. Times I was arrested – times I was in jail – times I was court ordered to rehab. These are times I am now SO grateful for. Had I not been arrested I wouldn’t have changed my ways and would probably be 6 feet under at the rate I was going. Jail taught me to be grateful for breathing fresh air, ability to eat healthy, and the beauty of turning on and off your own light – things that before that experience I most definitely took for granted. And lastly, rehab. It took me nearly 9 months to even realize that I had a problem, to really accept what I had become.

Through this acceptance I found strength and willpower to change, to make my life better. Since I have changed, the blessings I have received have been infinite. I can utilize my strengths in recovery to help other individuals going through similar circumstances. I have accepted myself and can now follow the path I was meant to. Still acceptance can be difficult, the mind is tricky and when you don’t pay attention it can get the best of you. Even in sobriety I don’t always accept myself or others. I tell myself I’m not good enough, I have crazy expectations for my partner, and I let it really bum me out if a friend gets called in to work and must bail on plans (like they can control that, ha!). These feelings and thoughts do not infiltrate my mind every day, but they still do sometimes. This brings gratitude beyond words for AA – as it reminds me to how to live. How to survive all the crazy life has to offer and not revert to using substances to cope.

I am sharing this in hopes for whomever reads it, that you find some acceptance today. Find acceptance in yourself, in your lover, in your parents, in your children, in your friends, in your coworker, in the idiot driving slow in the left lane, and the crazy one driving fast in the right lane. Accept life on life’s terms. You are the only one standing in-between you and happiness. Get out the way!

Contradicting Thoughts and Realizations 

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I went to a CA meeting on New Year’s Eve. The gentleman sharing was 21 years old. He had 5 years clean. I instantly judged him as not credible. He didn’t have enough experience. He didn’t have enough to lose.

Then he said something that instantly made me feel terrible about my judgments. “It doesn’t matter if you hit rock bottom or not we are all here for the same reason.” We go to meetings because we have a problem, we keep it anonymous to not be judged, we all agree we need help and that we cannot stay clean doing it alone. 

I felt horrible for having that initial thought, but that’s the point right? To catch ourselves if we do something wrong, recognize the error, and make it right. I realized this initial thought was silly based on one of my own beliefs. You only hit rock bottom when you die, if you are still alive there is still room for improvement. If you aren’t alive, you never have a chance to make things right. It doesn’t take a major life event to open your eyes to your addiction or a developing addiction. Sometimes all it takes is a realization that alcohol or drugs are causing you more pain then the pain you aim to escape from. Meetings are to give hope, to know you’re not alone, and something greater can help you conquer your addiction in despair. 

Pain is the touchstone of spiritual growth. It is important to stop pursuing whatever your idea of perfection is, you will never be happy if you aim for such an ideal. Find beauty in the littlr things. Happiness is appreciating what you have, not getting what you want.

Sobriety is a journey not a destination. I am excited to see what 2018 has in store for me!

#alwaysgettingbetter 

Nataranjasana

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Natarajasana, Lord of the Dance Pose.
Nata means “dancer”, raja means “king”, and asana means “posture”. Nataraja was a name given to the Hindu God Shiva, the great destroyer, in his form as the cosmic dancer.

I have always been in love with dance and utilizing different ways of movement to express myself. Breathing in this pose feels so right. Natarajasana stretches the shoulders, chest, thigh, groins, and abdomen. It strengthens the legs and ankles while improving balance.  This pose is an opportunity to cultivate an ability to shift out of the multi-tasking mentality the world seems to demand and move into this essential, centralized energy and space.

Looking to open and balance some of your chakras? This pose is great for encouraging love, personal power, and creativity by activating the heart, solar plexus, and sacral chakras.

Natarajasana is metaphorically dancing through our samsaras. Why is it that we refuse at times to see ourselves as divine beings?

This pose requires and builds full-body strength, flexibility, and coordination. Do not do this pose if you have an ankle, knee or low back injury, are currently experiencing low blood pressure, dizziness, migraines, or insomnia. So how do you get into it?

1. Begin in Tadasana (Mountain Pose)
2. Shift your weight to your left foot
3. Bend right leg to bring right heel toward sit bone
4. Draw the knees together and scoop the tailbone down while hugging the mid-line with both thighs
5. Raise your right arm up overhead while simultaneously kicking the right foot high to the sky connecting the right hand to the inside of your foot. If it’s available raise your left hand to meet your right foot as well, otherwise let it float, palms up in front of you.
6. Pull right ribs and hip forward while drawing in your right shoulder socket – working to square off the torso to the front
7. Lift through your heart, draw your belly in, and continue to hug towards the mid-line
8. Allow your drishti to be at the middle finger of your left hand (about third eye level)
… And now just breath. (Don’t forget to do the other side!)

Modifications:

  • Bow a the waist reaching heart forward
  • Holding toe of back foot pull elbow up with arm now reaching back over side of head
  • Use a strap wrapped around top of foot of lifted leg
  • For gentle variation stand with a wall 2 feet in front of you to balance

Utilize this pose to dance through your own samsaras, recognize what kleshas you fall in to and how to move through them. Not sure what a klesha is? Stay tuned … 🙂

Benefits of Reiki

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Improve and maintain health
We all have our own healing energy. We heal easier when our energy is high. But over time, we use up this energy. Reiki brings this healing energy back and supports the body’s natural ability to heal.
Studies have proven that reiki helps patients heal faster and with less pain. It allows a normal healthy flow of energy to resume and washes away any negativity lodged in the body; hence, allowing the body to heal.
A growing number of physicians are recognizing the benefits of Reiki. In fact, studies show that about 15% of hospitals and medical facilities across the country have been offering this healing practice to help ease pain and speed recovery.

Cultivate more positive emotions
Reiki provides great relief during emotional distress. This healing practice allows you to let go of negative emotions and replaces them with feelings of trust, care and love. It improves your capacity for empathy and enhances your capability to love. Because of this, it helps strengthen personal relationships and opens you up to the people around you.

Relieve stress
​Stress reduction is one of the greatest benefits provided by reiki. The light touch of reiki provides a sense of calmness. It encourages you to let go of negative emotions, fear, anxiety and stress. 5 minutes of reiki a day can provide a calming, lasting benefit.

Interested in receiving the healing treatment or training of your own? Reach out to me and I can guide you in the right direction!