Dhumavati Celebration

Dhumavati is described as a giver of siddhis (supernatural powers), a rescuer from all troubles, and a granter of all desires and rewards, including ultimate knowledge and moksha (salvation).

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Dhumavati personifies the dark side of life, her name meaning “she who is made of smoke.” Smoke is a side effect of fire which is dark, polluting, and concealing. It is emblematic of the worse facets of human existence, these concepts are very ancient referring to keeping life’s inevitable suffering at bay. Generally represented by a crow, a symbol of loss, destruction, decay, and misfortune.

From her we can look at two ideas; one being unpleasant experiences will eventually result in a disgust that will turn us towards the divine, the other being the divine is everywhere – even what we ordinarily consider ugly or foul. All goddesses hold wisdom, Dhumavati shows us their should be a practical insight that the infinite Mother is everywhere.

How many times have you thought something was horrible then a day, a month, a few years later it ended up being a blessing in disguise? Misfortune may always appear different in retrospect. Adversity builds character and can turn an ordinary soul into an extraordinary one. Inevitably, the ebb and flow of ups and downs will continue as time goes on. Use today in representation of her as a lesson to cultivate detachment, seek hidden blessings, and continue the path to liberation.  Dhumavati’s worship is prescribed to ward off all the negativity that she stands for and to transcend the smoke screen to acquire true knowledge.

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Contradicting Thoughts and Realizations 

I went to a CA meeting on New Year’s Eve. The gentleman sharing was 21 years old. He had 5 years clean. I instantly judged him as not credible. He didn’t have enough experience. He didn’t have enough to lose.

Then he said something that instantly made me feel terrible about my judgments. “It doesn’t matter if you hit rock bottom or not we are all here for the same reason.” We go to meetings because we have a problem, we keep it anonymous to not be judged, we all agree we need help and that we cannot stay clean doing it alone. 

I felt horrible for having that initial thought, but that’s the point right? To catch ourselves if we do something wrong, recognize the error, and make it right. I realized this initial thought was silly based on one of my own beliefs. You only hit rock bottom when you die, if you are still alive there is still room for improvement. If you aren’t alive, you never have a chance to make things right. It doesn’t take a major life event to open your eyes to your addiction or a developing addiction. Sometimes all it takes is a realization that alcohol or drugs are causing you more pain then the pain you aim to escape from. Meetings are to give hope, to know you’re not alone, and something greater can help you conquer your addiction in despair. 

Pain is the touchstone of spiritual growth. It is important to stop pursuing whatever your idea of perfection is, you will never be happy if you aim for such an ideal. Find beauty in the littlr things. Happiness is appreciating what you have, not getting what you want.

Sobriety is a journey not a destination. I am excited to see what 2018 has in store for me!

#alwaysgettingbetter